The South Tampa Douche Bag Club (STD’s) wants you in the club! They are now aggressively reaching out to the community to invite potential members to learn more about, experience and to join the club.

The founding of the club is unclear in history. Yet they have been central to Tampa Bay politics and society for decades. These elites have the firm attention of the media and government, receiving special treatment from each in recognition of their elite status and special value to the community.

The STD’s want you to know that even as an elite social class their membership is open and attainable to anyone who meets these basic requirements:

1)      You must own and wear a colored sports shirt, preferable Ed Hardy though Tommy Hilfiger will do in some cases.

2)      You must live outside of your means, consume conspicuously with out concern for savings (plan on driving a BMW but need to have 4 roommates in your 2 bedroom apartment).

3)      You will need a derogatory attitude towards women.

4)      You should be arrogant to the point of narcissism.

5)      You must live in South Tampa, renting or owning.

6)      Gelling your hair is highly recommended.

7)      You must be willing to follow the crowd on all decision.

Contrary to public appearance you do not need to be wealthy you need only to behave as if you are wealthy. You do not need to be important only tell people that you are.

As a member of the South Tampa Douche Bag Club (STD’s) you will wrap yourself in an appearance of importance, wealth and elitism that frees your ego so you can incessantly speak of yourself to others, at great lengths.